The Snare of Symmetry C6

Chapter 6

Their night was long.

And just before morning broke, Bernard slipped out of the room without a sound.

The hotel lobby, still untouched by dawn, was quiet. Bernard got into a taxi, hoping only that he didn’t look ridiculous. He didn’t have the courage to stay until morning and explain himself.

His phone was filled with missed calls.

Most of them were from Rhyno.

Several more—from Elliott.

The moment he entered the house, where the family was still asleep, Bernard shut himself inside the bathroom. That day, he sat in the bathtub for a long time, counting the water that overflowed as the night dragged on.

Exactly as much as his tears.

His knees, drawn tightly to his chest, were stained red and wouldn’t fade.

An emotion he couldn’t tell apart—fear or joy—pressed down on his heart. The guilt of pretending to be his brother clogged his throat, arriving too late. Unable even to cry properly, Bernard spent a long time doing nothing but gasping for breath.

“You look… arousing.”

“That’s—”

“Never heard something like that before?”

Compliments that continued as hands roamed over his body.

Strong arms that held him when he cried.

Kisses that followed the helpless laughter when he ran out of breath.

It had all been sweet—almost too gentle, and Rubens’s figure, glimpsed intermittently in the dark, was unforgettable.

“I was wrong.”

Rubens let out a self-mocking sigh as his teeth grazed Bernard’s shoulder. Bernard struggled for air at the overwhelming presence pressed against him, yet still tried to meet Rubens’s gaze.

“…I really didn’t come to sell myself. I wasn’t trying to lure you.”

“You… said that—ah, wait—!”

“Clumsy. So immature.”

Rubens laughed as he said it. Not knowing what he was laughing at, Bernard foolishly tried to laugh along—only to groan as he was driven deeper.

“It hurts.”

Rubens kept saying things Bernard couldn’t understand.

“Feels like you won’t let me hold on.”

Bernard jerked when his waist was grabbed tightly, but Rubens didn’t let go.

“Ah… right. Maybe I was too late. Congratulations—on graduating.”

Only then did Bernard realize something.

It was the first time anyone had congratulated him on his graduation.

Even at the ceremony, his parents had been too busy fussing over Elliott’s mortarboard to say a single word to Bernard.

Rubens’s gentle touch, his kisses, his incomprehensible words—all of it melted Bernard. The heat in Rubens’s voice felt like it would burn away every inch of skin it touched.

Bernard cried like a child—but to Rubens, it must have seemed like nothing more than post-coital clinging.

It was that kind of night.

A night where crying wasn’t punished.

A night where everything was permitted.

As Rubens kept watching Bernard with interest, pressing him forward as though urging him to take the next step, Bernard wrapped his arms around Rubens’s neck and nodded again and again.

“I like you. I’ll come looking for you.”

“…Are you sure? I’m not… the person you think I am—mm—!”

“If I find you, then… shall we try a passionate romance?”

Remembering that made Bernard’s heart pound violently.

But surely—he wouldn’t really come looking.

Finding someone as unremarkable as him would take a miracle. So Bernard would live as if dead, endure as if nothing had happened.

His neck burned red.

But his resolve was far too fragile to withstand the reality closing in.

Rubens, left behind in the hotel room, let out a dry laugh as he stared at the table where not even a single note had been left.

He’d woken up when the morning sun faintly soaked the sheets, instinctively reaching for the empty space beside him—only to open his eyes alone.

The neatly made bed, the slippers set tidily in place—it was all unreal, as if no one had ever been there at all.

Only the discarded condom in the trash proved the night had been real.

“Damn… first time I’ve been fucked and dumped.”

Rubens scrubbed his face, recalling the way Bernard had cried helplessly beneath him all night. His glossy black hair fell into disarray with the movement.

That small, round face cradled in one hand as it cried without restraint.

The slender waist clinging to him, clearly inexperienced.

The fingertips that barely dared to hold him, afraid to leave marks.

All of it lingered.

“You show them there’s something absolute they can stand on. Then… the anxiety settles.”

Rolling the words he’d dismissed as meaningless nonsense around in his mind, Rubens smoothed the bedding.

Lonely?

After a brief pause, he scoffed.

“Arrogant little thing. Telling me to really come find you…”

Yet the man’s face was filled more with amusement than irritation.

Only now did he realize—he’d been drifting without knowing it.

Bernard’s days were chaos.

One day passed. Then two.

There was no word from Rubens.

Of course there wouldn’t be. He’d said come find me, but there was no way Rubens would truly do so. Bernard had only let himself hope foolishly.

“Elliott.”

“Ah, Bernard.”

Elliott smiled faintly as he adjusted his tie. Bernard straightened it for him, glancing sideways at his complexion. He looked unusually bright.

“Running late?”

“Probably. I’ve got plans.”

He’d mentioned an invitation to some gathering. After seeing him off, Bernard felt restless and threw himself into long-postponed work—household chores, and the tasks Liam had dumped on him.

“…I’m not thinking straight.”

Life refused to return to normal.

Bernard kept fiddling with his phone, locking himself in the house to work or reading endlessly. One day, he suddenly realized—

Every book he’d been reading was romance.

And every description of the love interest resembled Rubens.

“Rubens.”

That name had belonged only to that night—but Bernard found himself whispering it in secret again and again. Each time, something in his chest ached, whether from guilt or expectation, he couldn’t tell.

Was it because Cinderella could flee the ball after dancing with the prince—because she resolved to return to her plain life, carrying only the warmth of that one night?

Lately, Elliott had been going out often, saying many people were looking for him. Sarah worried it might harm his health. Even when she insisted Bernard accompany him, Elliott stubbornly went alone, making it hard to see his face at all.

When he did come home, his face bloomed with smiles. Liam clicked his tongue, saying he had no idea who Elliott was meeting.

Unlike them, Bernard only worried—quietly—that some unsavory person had latched onto his gentle brother. Elliott was overly kind even to strange people. He’d attracted stalkers before, mistaking his kindness for affection.

That worry wasn’t unfounded.

“Bernard… Bernard, are you asleep?”

That night, Elliott came home late.

The faint knock and tipsy voice woke Bernard from a light sleep. Elliott wasn’t one to drink this much. When Bernard opened the door, the smell of alcohol rushed out.

“Elliott. What have you been doing lately?”

“I met someone fun.”

“Fun?”

Bernard narrowed his eyes. When drunk, Elliott rambled freely, veering off without listening to anyone.

“I’ll introduce you later. You’ll like them too.”

“Are you dating someone?”

“Secret. It’s a secret.”

The smile on Elliott’s face was strangely suggestive. To Bernard, it only looked suspicious—but he didn’t press, instead supporting Elliott.

“Come on. Let’s get you upstairs.”

Elliott muttered something, which Bernard dismissed as sleep talk. A heavy perfume clung to Elliott’s clothes—clearly not his own. The scent felt familiar, but the memory vanished almost immediately.

“Watch your step. Please—if you fall, you’ll get hurt.”

“I’m fine. I’m fine.”

Bernard held him firmly as they moved. Everyone around Elliott knew he was weak to alcohol—so where had he drunk this much?

“Are you really dating someone, Elliott?”

After laying him down and undoing his buttons, Bernard received no answer. Elliott was already half asleep. Bernard pulled the blanket up and patted his chest until his breathing evened out.

Though they were twins born minutes apart, Elliott often felt like a child to Bernard. Perhaps it was because he’d spent so much time in hospital beds.

From a young age, Sarah and Liam had taught Bernard to take good care of Elliott—since Bernard alone had been born healthy.

Bernard grew up in that abuse.

A warped life that felt normal to him.

Only as he aged did he realize something was wrong—but under constant conditioning, he obeyed without resistance.

Rubbing his sleepy eyes, Bernard returned to his own room. Yet an unease lingered in his chest. Perhaps because of that, nightmares shook him awake again and again.

By the time he finally drifted into real sleep near morning, Elliott had already left the house.

Is he really… dating someone?

If so—who?