AAGULT Ch 84

Chapter 84

“……”

Though it felt unfamiliar, this place was home to Jaeha. A chill ran down the back of his neck. Would things have turned out better if he hadn’t informed through Lee Do-ssi about the betrayal? If so, maybe he wouldn’t have come boldly into the Association’s den, trying to take him back.

“I-I don’t want to…”

“You don’t?”

Without thinking about the consequences, Jaeha’s mouth answered on its own. Realizing it too late, he squeezed his eyes shut and began to ramble excuses.

“I-I know I haven’t repaid Mr. President’s kindness yet. I promise, I’ll spend the rest of my life repaying it. But really… really, I-I like it here. I-I absolutely won’t testify against Mr. President. I won’t betray you that far. I swear…”

Mr. President always pretended not to care, but he had, in his own way, shown affection toward Jaeha. Maybe if he acted cute or showed a bit of charm again, he’d let him off like before? Jaeha had no value to the organization. He didn’t understand why the man showed such strange obsession toward someone like him, who had lost almost all his abilities and his ranking—he must be even more useless now.

Unable to face him directly, Jaeha instead took his hand and nuzzled against it. That wasn’t enough—he pushed his face into the man’s lap. With trembling hands, he placed the man’s hand on top of his head, as if demanding to be petted—a brazen act.

“……”

With a faint chuckle, he complied, gently running his fingers through Jaeha’s hair. Every time the leather-clad fingers brushed against his earlobes, goosebumps erupted all over his body.

“You like the Association?”

Instead of getting angry or trying to drag him away by force, he asked calmly. But Jaeha didn’t lower his guard. Was he letting him off again this time? Or was he testing him? What should he do to persuade him…?

“Yes…”

“Alright. It’s possible to like it.”

“……”

While Jaeha leaned against his lap like a pillow, he began to roll strands of his hair between his fingers, deep in thought. Jaeha thought that if he jumped in now and said something—anything—he might sway the man’s decision, so he started babbling without really knowing what he was saying.

“I-I’ve caused a lot of trouble so far… You must’ve had a hard time because of me… Maybe now, if I become independent, you’ll finally have some peace. And, Mr. President, you used to receive a lot of guiding, but these days you don’t seem to… I’m worried… If you go back and get guided and rest properly…”

He even brought up the man’s physical condition, which he had deliberately avoided mentioning until now—his body, hollowed out like a desert. Maybe, unconsciously, he had been worried after all. Absurd. Why worry? The man could take care of himself. He didn’t need anything from Jaeha.

“Song Jaeha.”

“Y-Yes…”

But his words seemed to have no effect whatsoever. While gently patting Jaeha’s head, the man finally organized his thoughts and spoke. He even interrupted Jaeha mid-sentence.

“What’s your current rank?”

“…I dropped to F-class, but today I was healed back to E-class…”

“I see.”

Having confirmed it, he lifted Jaeha’s face. Jaeha looked up at him just as he wanted.

“The neutralizer is nearly complete.”

“…Is that so?”

“Once it’s finished, I’ll hand it over to Kwon Ido-ssi.”

“……”

Why was he telling him this? Jaeha stayed silent and simply stared, prompting the man to explain.

“I told them to tailor it for you.”

“……”

He ordered them—to tailor it for me? What would happen if he took that finished neutralizer? Would he become an ordinary person, through and through?

“You don’t want that?”

Don’t want it? Of course not. Jaeha, forgetting the thoughts he had when he’d first been rescued by the Association—thoughts like “should I really be angry about this?”—watched him nervously and voiced his opinion. That he didn’t want it.

“…I don’t want it.”

“Why not?”

Faced with his genuinely curious question, Jaeha was at a loss for words. After a moment’s silence, he finally spoke.

“I-I want to stay in the Association.”

It was an acceptable excuse. A heartfelt one at that. Jaeha liked it here. It was a place that offered the warmth of sunlight, care, and the hope of working alongside someone he liked.

Apart from how he felt about Mr. President, Jaeha knew he could never laugh under him—under his grasp. He simply couldn’t imagine a future in that position. That was an undeniable truth. Besides, to the man, Jaeha wasn’t anything particularly special. He desperately hoped the man would just let him go.

“So, Mr. President… please, just stop…”

Then the man grabbed him by the collar and yanked him forward. His log-like arm easily lifted Jaeha’s adult frame as though uprooting a radish.

“Ugh…!”

“Did you know, Jaeha?”

“W-What…”

“You were the one who first said you didn’t want to be an esper.”

“……”

Me? That couldn’t be. Though he didn’t respond aloud, his eyes clearly expressed denial, and the man seemed to interpret them without error as he tilted his head.

“You don’t seem to believe me…”

“……”

“Then say it now. Say that you like being an esper. Say it with your own mouth.”

“……”

He couldn’t say it. It should’ve been simple—just say it—but the words wouldn’t come. He felt like throwing up. Did he like being an esper? Even if he wasn’t an esper, could he continue living peacefully as he did now? Could he be certain he wouldn’t be cast out?

Maybe… maybe it would be better to become a pitiful, sickly ordinary person and crawl back under Mr. President’s control…

No. Song Jaeha, get a grip. This situation was too surreal. Strange. Why couldn’t he speak?

“I know you better than you know yourself, Jaeha.”

“……”

“Listen to me.”

Get it together, Song Jaeha.

“N-No, you’re wrong…”

Even he felt confused. His thoughts before the man’s arrival and the words the man had said were all jumbled in his mind. Though he was the one in chaos, he tried to soothe the man with words.

“Y-You’re just lacking in guiding right now, Mr. President… You’re having a momentary delusion. That’s all it is.”

In Jaeha’s words—instinctive and unconscious—the term “guiding” could not be left out. After all, it was Aiden-ssi’s ecstatic guiding that had pulled his miserable life out of the mud. No matter how much the man claimed to dislike guiding, he was still an esper. Espers couldn’t survive without it, and Jaeha was well aware of that fact.

“Lacking guiding? Haha.”

The man laughed, as if he found it ridiculous.

“Right, guiding. That goddamn guiding. Sure, it’s great.”

“S-So…”

Even while laughing like that, the hatred for guiding on his face was plain to see—it was uncanny. Jaeha was dumbfounded. Despite the contradiction, it felt like the first time he had ever seen the man so vividly alive. Why was he so… why was he so worked up? Was it because Jaeha was being stubborn?

Or… was it still because of their past, which Jaeha couldn’t understand?

“Fine, I’ll take it.”

He—Mr. President—jerked Jaeha closer by the collar.

“Ugh…!”

His throat was crushed so viciously he couldn’t breathe. More than the suffocation, it was the urge to vomit that hit first. Instinctively, he struggled, clawing at the arm around his neck. The man didn’t budge.

Pinning Jaeha against the wall, he kissed him.

Thud!

His body slammed hard into the wall, but the pain was less shocking than the feeling of that kiss. Because of the esper’s brute strength, part of the wall crumbled, scattering debris and dust across the floor.

“Mmph, uh…!”

The dry, unmoistened lips rubbing against each other felt stranger than expected. And the fact that this was someone he had considered a father figure, an older brother—it made it all the more wrong. He kept his mouth shut tight and turned his head, but the man gripped his neck so tightly that his airway collapsed, and his mouth was forced open.

“Urgh… cough, hah…”

“……”

Saliva dripped. A thick tongue invaded his mouth violently, pushing toward his throat. He hadn’t experienced many kisses in his life, but he knew enough to say this couldn’t be considered a normal act of affection.

His head, which had been rattled from hitting the wall, throbbed dully—only then did he realize this was the “guiding” the man had referred to. Just like how Jaeha had once taken from him, now the man was consuming the guiding that overflowed within Jaeha—using sheer violence to do so.

“Hff…”

“……”

He frowned. The distance was too close to focus properly, but one thing was clear—he wasn’t closing his eyes. Those pitch-black eyes struck heavy against Jaeha’s heart. Even while committing such a violent kiss, he remained eerily expressionless.

“Hoo…”

The fury that had stirred him moments ago seemed to have evaporated, and now he revealed his teeth. The sudden pain sobered Jaeha, and he began to struggle in earnest. He scratched at the forearm pressed against his neck, even dared to pound his shoulder. Yet the man didn’t move an inch.

“Ugh…”

Chomp—his lip was bitten down hard, the flesh tearing and blood dripping. Human flesh is tougher than it looks, but with such intent to tear, the teeth inevitably broke through. It hurt terribly. Tears welled up from sheer physical pain.