AAGULT Ch 18

Chapter 18

 

Once the line had been crossed once, it wasn’t hard to cross it two or three more times.

The resolve to meet him less frequently had become meaningless—Jaeha couldn’t forget that guiding, and when he came, Jaeha brought him into the room. When he called, Jaeha ran out to him. In the end, they shared their bodies a few more times. Jaeha cried his eyes out each time, but he quickly got used to the act.

It felt strange.

He blamed himself for having no principles, cursed himself inwardly, yet still justified his actions. If he had never known the painlessness that came from being without guiding deficiency, maybe it would’ve been different. But after experiencing that fullness and satisfaction, like returning to life before becoming an Esper—as a normal person—he couldn’t help but blindly crave it.

So, Jaeha endured.

“Uugh…!”

He barely suppressed the gag reflex that came immediately after swallowing the ampoule.

Because he had been taking the ampoule excessively more often than before he met the man, the side effects Jaeha now experienced were more than just a queasy stomach.

Moreover, he wasn’t even in a state of guiding deficiency now, so there was no need to suppress or restrain his waves. It was ridiculous that he was now taking the drug just to see that man again. Because he had to pretend he was an F-rank…

“Cough, haah, ugh…!”

Eventually, the ampoule in his hand fell to the ground. The sound of shattering glass echoed. Ah, the glass is thin—it’ll be annoying to clean up… Swallowing his irritation, he coughed a few more times. His stomach churned. It was different from the pain caused by guiding deficiency. A hot, sharp pain surged from his throat, and he vomited. It was blood.

“Huff, haah…”

His throat hurt terribly. Trying to endure the searing pain that boiled like fire, he shut his eyes tightly and wiped the bloodstained corners of his mouth with some nearby tissues. Bright red blood stained the tissue.

This side effect had started about a week ago. The first time he coughed up blood, Jaeha, being the coward he was, had immediately rushed to an illegal doctor nearby. He was terrified that he might have some serious illness.

But after a brief examination, all he received was an annoyed scolding.

“Stop taking suppressants so damn much.”

“Huh, what…?”

“Didn’t the boss already tell you? That drug isn’t even fully tested yet. If you want to avoid side effects, the best thing to do is take it once every three days. Just how often are you taking it right now?”

“…”

He couldn’t answer. Lately, Jaeha had been taking the drug not once every three days but once a day—sometimes even twice a day.

“You’re an Esper. If you stop taking the drug, you’ll recover quickly… assuming you get proper guiding, that is.”

“…”

The doctor knew Jaeha’s situation. The man, who had been replying disinterestedly, rolled his eyes and clicked his tongue. That’s right—Jaeha was a unique case, even within this organization. Of course, the fact that he had received guiding and wasn’t currently experiencing guiding deficiency was an absolute secret, even from him.

“Want some painkillers?”

“Would that… help?”

“Better than nothing. At this stage of severe side effects, even if you space out your doses, it won’t make much difference…”

Whether he withered away from lack of guiding or suffered side effects from the suppressant, it was one or the other. In the end, he urgently swallowed the painkillers he was given.

“Haa…”

Jaeha felt utterly pathetic. These side effects could’ve been avoided. And yet, here he was, vomiting blood by his own choice. It was laughable.

Leaning his forehead against the bathroom wall and trying to steady his breath, he pulled out his phone and opened a text he received last night.

Want to meet outside tomorrow?

“…”

It had already been three days since they’d last slept together. It was in a hotel—one of those fancy ones Jaeha couldn’t have imagined stepping foot in. The whole experience felt strange. Afterward, the man let Jaeha sleep soundly, fed him delicious food, and only then sent him home. Jaeha had tried to take out his wallet to pay at least for the food, but the man always refused with a smile. It had felt oddly like being properly cared for, which also felt strange.

So, in short…

Honestly, there was no need to meet him again. It hadn’t even been a guiding session, and yet all of Jaeha’s torn-up waves had been restored. Even if he never saw the man again, he could now wait for his boss—who wouldn’t return for several months—without any complaints.

But when he received the text, he immediately replied.

Sure!

It was a stupid response.

He felt like a dog wagging its tail and running out to greet someone. The even more ridiculous part was—it didn’t feel all that bad. Not seeing him felt more painful than these side effects.

Why was that? Was it the guiding that had bewitched him? Or was it the man himself? For now, Jaeha didn’t know. He just hoped it wasn’t the latter.

That’s why he took another dose of the ampoule to keep up the lie of being an F-rank Esper. He rinsed the metallic taste from his mouth with water and cleaned up the shattered glass on the floor. He could only hope his body, slightly stronger than an ordinary person’s, would endure a bit longer.

“What time is it…”

There were no appointments today, and Harin had been given a week-long paid vacation for Christmas. Even if he opened late, no one would complain.

Confirming that it was 10 a.m. and that he still had plenty of time, Jaeha straightened his clothes. The painkiller seemed to be kicking in now—his senses began to dull. His stomach felt a bit better. Though the pallor hadn’t completely left his face…

Christmas was just three days away. The weather had turned much colder, so Jaeha wore a thick coat and wrapped a scarf tightly around his neck. It was an old beige scarf, frayed and worn from years of use after buying it when he left the orphanage.

“…This is okay, right?”

Just before going out, he checked his appearance again in the mirror. He neatly brushed back his hair, double-checked that there were no bloodstains… The scarf bothered him, so he fiddled with it. He’d never cared this much about his appearance before, but he didn’t want to look shabby in front of him.

He thought about taking it off, but the whole thing felt too much like checking one’s looks before a date, so he gave up on the idea. What a fool. He didn’t forget to scold himself again.

After carefully grabbing the shop keys and his phone, Jaeha was about to head out when—

Ding.

His phone alarm rang, and he turned on the screen while holding the door.

There was a new message.

For Kim Hyungjun, a B-rank Esper affiliated with the Association, today was the strangest day he had ever experienced.

It all started with a gate that appeared in the middle of Seoul just three days before Christmas. As part of the Association’s B-3 team in the XX district of Seoul, Hyungjun had been summoned to deal with the gate.

It was a D-rank gate, the kind that usually took around five hours to clear—below average in difficulty. Since the B-3 team was dispatched early in the morning, they expressed annoyance at the timing rather than any worry or tension. The clear was not difficult at all.

“Hey, Hyungjun…”

“Uh… yes, leader.”

“Are we sure we didn’t just go into a double gate or an S-rank gate? Or was there something weird about this gate?”

“I… don’t… think so…?”

Hyungjun barely managed to reply, but he couldn’t say it with certainty. Even he wasn’t sure.

The source of all this confusion was the guide who was currently holding the team members’ hands and performing guiding. It wasn’t uncommon for a guide to support Espers with post-mission guiding outside a gate. A-level teams had their own dedicated guides who followed them around. Teams like B-3, which were considered lower-tier, typically received guiding at a facility afterward. But sometimes, when lucky, they’d get guided by a support guide like this.

However, this man…

“That person’s Aiden, right?”

“Whoa… I thought he went on a dispatch to the U.S.?”

“I heard he went to Europe.”

“He came back about a month ago.”

Aiden wasn’t a well-known face among the general public, but within the Association and among Espers, he was often mentioned. He was someone many Espers looked up to. Of course, Hyungjun knew of him too—though this was his first time seeing him in person.

“Wow, it’s my first time seeing Aiden.”

“Why is he even here?”

“No idea? I heard he just volunteered for this.”

Not only Hyungjun, but all his team members were seeing Aiden for the first time. He hadn’t introduced himself, but everyone instinctively knew who he was.

If you were an Esper who regularly received guiding through the Association, it was impossible not to recognize him. The guiding aura he emitted was on a completely different level from any guide working in a regular facility. Just feeling his radiating waves from a distance was enough to calm their frayed energy.

“Do you all not need guiding?”

“Ah, uh… we’ll gratefully accept.”

But once they heard that man’s soft voice, they couldn’t refuse. Really, how many Espers in the world could say no to that question? Hyungjun had always been skeptical when he heard rumors that Aiden was that gentle and kind.

But they were true.