dreams spun in berries & fluff
    Chapter Index

    Rate on NU

    Chapter 1

    “I want a divorce.”

    It was the end of February, when the biting chill of the last cold snap still lingered. They were having a rare meal together, and as always, Go Igyeol waited until his partner’s spoon was set down on the table before speaking. The moment the man emptied the glass of water placed before him and finally turned his gaze toward the person sitting opposite, words that should have been held back broke through his beautiful lips and burst forth at last.

    “Let’s get a divorce.”

    “Say that again.”

    “
Our contract still has time left on the marriage term, but—.”

    “I don’t quite understand. Was that really something you were in a position to demand from me, Go Igyeol?”

    His calm words cut off, his face taking on the expression of someone saddled with an irksome chore. His eyes showed no affection as they pierced through Go Igyeol, scrutinizing him as though searching for something, probing whether he was hiding anything. His striking face wavered faintly beneath that gaze, the fine strands of his brown hair swaying softly with the movement of his head.

    “As you said yourself, there’s still plenty of time left.”

    “
My heart has changed.”

    “Explain it plainly. Just what feeling of yours has changed?”

    “I no longer
 want to live together.”

    The attitude of the man sitting across from him was as arrogant as ever, his tone tinged with his characteristic languidness. As his long fingers pressed against his temple, his cold eyes closed and then slowly reopened.

    “If we divorce now, what do you think will happen to your father?”

    “
I’ll take care of it so that he won’t be troubled. I’ll explain it properly so that you won’t suffer any—.”

    “You must not realize how much I’ve been watching over that pathetic business your father insists on pursuing. That must be why you’re saying such nonsense, with that vacant, thoughtless look on your face.”

    Seo Dohyeon deliberately chose the word stupid, but Go Igyeol’s reaction was no different from usual. Detached, with no overt sign of interest in anything, his objectively and subjectively flawless face did not meet Dohyeon’s gaze but instead fixed itself on the edge of the dining table or the patterns on the empty bowls.

    As always, not a single hair of his was out of place. That unnervingly unaffected demeanor, which had first attracted Dohyeon despite his young age, grew more and more grating the longer they lived together. It would have been easier if he lost his temper or made demands honestly. Yet, the more time they spent together, the more naturally Go Igyeol concealed his feelings. Never once had he voiced even the smallest complaint.

    The more he concealed, the more honest he became in bed. Because of that, Seo Dohyeon grew obsessively attached to their nights together. It was the only time he could glimpse Igyeol’s true self—how could he not become fixated? And so, Seo Dohyeon clung to him incessantly. If anything, their physical intimacy had cultivated a measure of attachment. That was why Igyeol, demanding a premature divorce merely because his “heart had changed,” was utterly absurd in Dohyeon’s eyes.

    “That’s why you should have thought carefully before signing the contract. Is it because you’re young? Didn’t you understand that the clause beginning with ‘Upon Breach’ was something to be feared?”

    “

”

    “You wouldn’t want your father to hear anyone say he was a fool for taking in a beast with black hair.”

    “My father is not that kind of person
!”

    “We’ll see. The father I know of yours seems exactly the sort who would.”

    Unconsciously, Go Igyeol covered his lower abdomen and bit his lip. Just hearing the word father wiped his mind blank. He should have raised his gaze to say something, but once that name was invoked, no words came. The chair scraped against the floor with a sharp noise as Seo Dohyeon rose, his meal finished.

    “I’ll pretend I never heard what you just said.”

    It was a declaration that he would not entertain the conversation again. Igyeol could not lift his head. Seo Dohyeon glanced at his omega, pale as chalk, and left the table with only the words: eat slowly and eat plenty.

    “Seven weeks pregnant. The uterus is well positioned, and the gestational sac looks beautiful. On the ultrasound the fetus is just under a centimeter, but still well within normal range. Have you experienced any morning sickness?”

    “My appetite is poor, and I
 I just seem to sleep so much, it felt odd.”

    “I see. And eating is fine so far? Around now is when nausea usually begins.”

    The kindly physician spoke with a gentle tone that betrayed her concern.

    “So
 I’m really pregnant
.”

    “Yes, you are. Did you test beforehand? At this stage, most notice because the lines show clearly. You seem very surprised.”

    The doctor squinted slightly before opening into a bright, cheerful smile, but Igyeol sealed his lips and simply nodded. Just as she’d said, the moment he’d seen the two bright lines, it felt as though his heart collapsed.

    He had wished desperately that it wasn’t true. Yet after Seo Dohyeon’s rut cycle, his body had grown unusually lethargic, his sleep increasing without explanation. Though he was always meticulous about contraception and never careless, the symptoms were undeniable. Even as he told himself it was impossible, fear gnawed at him, and he had tested, clinging to a sliver of hope that the results were wrong. But—

    “Congratulations on your pregnancy.”

    The test had not been mistaken. The pregnancy was confirmed.

    He felt cornered at the edge of a cliff. What now?

    His hands resting on his thighs grew cold.

    “Now, let’s listen to the heartbeat today as well. At seven weeks, it’s possible. Just a moment.”

    The doctor murmured cheerfully as she adjusted the machine. After a few clicks, the thudding—thump thump thump thump—echoed strongly in the room.

    “Faster than an adult’s heartbeat, isn’t it? At 139 bpm, the heart rate is perfectly normal.”

    “
The baby
.”

    “A little small, but growing beautifully. There—the tiny bean-shaped spot is the baby.”

    Following the pointed finger, Igyeol’s eyes fixed on the small, dark speck.

    “As it’s still early, you’ll need to come every two weeks for ultrasound checks until 12 weeks. After that, we’ll do detailed scans and then you’ll return every four weeks. Oh, and your partner’s pheromones will greatly affect the baby’s growth, your condition, and the severity of your morning sickness. You must undergo pheromone therapy from now on. For recessive traits especially, lack of partner pheromones greatly increases the risk of prenatal complications.”

    “
Perhaps
.”

    He bit off the question he almost voiced. Abortion. For omegas, it was illegal. Even as he thought he must search for a clinic willing to perform a termination, the thought left him paralyzed.

    The residual gel was wiped from his abdomen with a warm towel before he returned to receive further instructions. The doctor again cautioned him that miscarriage risks also rose without an alpha’s pheromones. With a stiff face, Igyeol nodded his understanding and stood. Bowing low to the doctor, he suddenly felt his vision spin. A bout of dizziness made him stagger.

    “Are you all right?”

    A nurse, present in the room, quickly steadied him. She held his frail, wavering body more firmly.

    “If the dizziness worsens, please mention it while you’re still here.”

    “I’m fine. Thank you.”

    “I’ll walk with you.”

    The nurse looked at his faint features and thought he seemed almost ethereally pure. Among the omegas who came through the hospital, such beauty was rare—every blink of his eyes was like art. Each glance compelled admiration. Yet she wondered why he did not seem delighted by his pregnancy.

    “If you continue to feel dizzy, do come in again, no matter the timing. You must take special care in the early stages. We’ll provide you with a maternity handbook—please be sure to read it. It contains all the supplements you’ll need at different stages.”

    She emphasized it again and again before handing him the handbook, explaining in detail what it contained.

    “Thank you. I’ll read it.”

    “Then, we’ll see you in two weeks. Don’t forget to schedule your next appointment during check-out.”

    After confirming multiple times with the nurse, Igyeol paid in cash and booked his next visit. He then slumped onto a waiting seat, his legs devoid of strength. His straight back gave way, and his small hands covered his face entirely as tears welled quickly.

    “
What do I do
”

    Seo Dohyeon didn’t want this pregnancy. He had always practiced strict contraception, so why was there a child? His thoughts fell apart in disarray. Immediately after seeing the test, Igyeol had pulled out the premarital contract they had signed and read it over and over. No matter how many times his eyes scanned it, nowhere among its meticulous stipulations was there any provision permitting them to bear and raise a child.

    If he could leave, even a day sooner
 perhaps he might keep Dohyeon from ever discovering the child’s existence. That desperate hope had driven him to demand an early divorce the night before, only to receive nothing but scorn in return. Even as Dohyeon’s razor-edged words pierced him, his mind repeated the clauses he had memorized as if engraved on his bones.

    [Clause 7] No children shall be conceived during the contract term.

    1. Seo Dohyeon and Go Igyeol shall use strict contraception during marital relations, and in the event of contraceptive failure, Go Igyeol shall not carry the pregnancy without Seo Dohyeon’s consent.

    2. In the case of unapproved conception or childbirth, Go Igyeol shall relinquish all parental and custodial rights.

    3. Seo Dohyeon shall retain all parental and custodial rights over the child.

    4. Immediately after birth, Go Igyeol shall not be permitted to see the child.

    5. The child’s gender, genetic, and trait test results shall not be disclosed to Go Igyeol.

    6. Should Seo Dohyeon relinquish custody and parental rights, the child shall undergo international adoption procedures, with no record of either parent entered with the adoption agency.

     

    Note