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    Extra 20 (Final)

    Seo Dohyeon emptied the third can just as quickly as the second. Meanwhile, Go Igyeol had dutifully finished an entire can himself. Every time the sharp, fizzy liquid slid down his throat, his normally neat brows scrunched and refused to smooth out. His cheeks flushed a rosy red, so endearingly warm that Dohyeon could think of nothing but how lovely he looked. The bright clarity in his eyes had softened into a hazy gleam.

    “Are you drunk?”

    “Uh
 no? I’m completely fine. Not even a little drunk.”

    His tone rose strangely at the end. Dohyeon watched the wide-eyed, overly serious answer, let out a small laugh, and nodded.

    “Are you planning to drink more?”

    “Of course, I’m going to drink.”

    Violently shaking his head, Igyeol tipped sideways toward Dohyeon. As if sharing a secret, he lowered his voice, pressing a finger to his lips. His left hand held up one finger, and his right hand held up two.

    “I bought twelve of these. I didn’t know how much you’d drink. But I think I’m going to drink
 um
 a lot more?”

    “No. You already seem drunk.”

    Dohyeon opened a new can and handed it to him. With reddened fingertips, Igyeol traced the droplets forming on the cold surface and lifted it to drink. There was no hesitation—he took a deep gulp.

    “Drink slowly.”

    “I heard beer is basically like a soft drink. But
 right here, it stings a bit.”

    Letting go of the can, Igyeol touched his own throat. The sensation of carbonation sliding down his esophagus seemed unfamiliar; every time he swallowed, his eyelashes trembled, his eyes shutting tight. The faint peach tint on his cheeks had deepened into an apple-red glow. His posture slumped, leaning to one side. When Dohyeon straightened him, he bobbed his head forward in a little nod.

    “Why are you sitting like that?”

    “

”

    “Leaning like this
.”

    “You’re the one leaning.”

    With gentle hands, Dohyeon set him upright. His head that had been wobbling forward and backward suddenly stilled. Dohyeon moistened his lips, meeting the soft, blurred gaze fixed on him. He wanted to kiss him.

    But when their faces drew close, Igyeol dodged, grinning mischievously.

    Was he in a good mood? His energy seemed higher than usual. He really did seem drunk. When Dohyeon tried to take away the beer in front of him, Igyeol clutched it protectively.

    “No? I’m not drunk. Who gets drunk after one can?”

    “Drink slowly. And eat something too.”

    “
You know, Dohyeon-ssi.”

    “Yes, Igyeol-ssi.”

    As if bracing himself, Igyeol bit down hard on his lip. His expression turned oddly solemn. He straightened the muscles around his eyes, gathered his thoughts, and finally spoke with unusual decisiveness.

    “I didn’t realize it before, but
 I want to give Ihyeon a younger sibling.”

    He articulated the words one by one, exactly as he had been thinking them. He tried hard to speak clearly so it wouldn’t sound like drunken nonsense. Maybe because that effort showed, Dohyeon didn’t hesitate for even a second.

    “No.”

    “Ah—w-why not?”

    “I thought we settled this that day.”

    “Why don’t you want to? You said Ihyeon is adorable.”

    His voice wilted. Dohyeon removed the can from Igyeol’s hand, setting it farther away, then tilted Igyeol’s chin up when he tried to hide his face. His eyes were getting damp from the refusal.

    “Igyeol-ssi.”

    “
Ihyeon might feel lonely, and I
 I sometimes think I would’ve liked having a sibling too. Haven’t you ever thought about it? If a family is
 larger
 wouldn’t that make it even happier?”

    “I’m already happy, Igyeol.”

    Pressing his lips firmly to the back of the hand he held, Dohyeon continued in his low, warm voice.

    “I live every day more blessed than I deserve. Because of you.”

    “

”

    “I’m happy, Igyeol.”

    “
But
 we could be even happier. The next baby could be healthier
 and born safely.”

    Dohyeon felt a faint ache in his chest. If that incident hadn’t happened, Ihyeon would have been born healthier. Igyeol wouldn’t have gone into premature labor. He wouldn’t have needed pheromone supplements every day because he couldn’t receive an alpha’s pheromones properly. If only things had gone differently, both the baby and Igyeol might have been healthy.

    But now?

    Now, natural conception was impossible.

    And even if he did become pregnant, they said maintaining it would be difficult.

    A healthy baby? And Igyeol staying healthy as well?

    Who would dare promise such a thing?

    His body had already been weakened far too much. Dohyeon did not want another child at the cost of Igyeol’s health.

    Hospitals together, watching a belly swell slowly, counting down the days until the baby arrived—those images would have been sweet in another life. But not if they required Igyeol to hurt.

    Just imagining a child that might never exist made him feel sick.

    “I already have more happiness than I need. I can’t give in on this.”

    “
Why? Why not?”

    “Because I don’t want you to suffer.”

    “But I’m fine. I’m not suffering at all.”

    His sharp insistence met Dohyeon’s equally firm reply.

    “You will never have my child again.”

    “

”

    “Hah
 no, that’s not what I meant.”

    Igyeol’s wounded eyes dropped, unable to meet his. The hand Dohyeon held tightly began to tremble. With each blink, heavy tears slipped free—plip, plip—falling one after another.

    “
I don’t want to drink anymore.”

    “Igyeol-ssi.”

    The moment he stood, his legs gave out and he lurched, but he avoided Dohyeon’s helping hand, turning away. Stumbling a little, he regained his balance and quickly left the dining room.

    Instead of lying on the bed, he walked into the bathroom. Though he had already showered, he intended to wash again—wash away the entire conversation, every part of today. His vision blurred. He didn’t even realize he was crying. He stripped off his clothes, tossed them into the laundry bin, stepped into the shower booth, and turned on the water immediately. Hot water poured down without delay.

    “Hh
 hhic
”

    Wasn’t this too much?

    How could he say something like that again?

    His chest tightened with resentment and hurt. Covering his face with both hands, he tried to muffle his sobs with the sound of running water. That was why he didn’t notice Dohyeon come in.

    The shower door opened, and Dohyeon wrapped his arms around Igyeol’s trembling back, letting out a faint sigh.

    “Igyeol.”

    “
hngh
 hic
”

    Turning him gently, Dohyeon pulled his small, shaking hands away from his face. Even as their eyes met, Igyeol immediately tried to look away, and Dohyeon cupped his cheeks firmly.

    “You’re still taking pheromone supplements. Because of me.”

    “

”

    “You have so many health issues because of me, and yet
 me wanting another child makes no sense.”

    Igyeol’s wavering expression finally crumpled. Warm water streamed down his shoulders, and the sob he had held back spilled out between quivering lips.

    “I’m
 scared. I can’t even imagine you having a safe pregnancy. I keep thinking something terrible might happen
 so how
 how could we have a baby?”

    “

”

    “
Igyeol.”

    Resting a kiss on his soaked shoulder, Dohyeon didn’t speak anymore. He simply held him—held his thin, trembling body until the shaking slowly faded. Only after even the faintest sob disappeared did he gently wash him.

    He dried Igyeol’s hair completely and led the still-dim-eyed man to bed. Lying beside him, he lifted Igyeol’s head onto his arm and wrapped him tightly in his embrace. Warm, fragile breaths fluttered against his neck. Through Igyeol’s pajamas, Dohyeon slowly stroked from the nape of his neck down to his waist, pressing a firm kiss to his smooth forehead.

    “I’ll be even more careful from now on.”

    “

”

    “And if someday you become truly healthy—healthy enough that we could consider it—then maybe
 maybe we could think about a second child who resembles you. Just like how Ihyeon looks like you and is beautiful to me
 if another baby also took after you
 that child would be just as precious. But right now, I can’t even bring myself to imagine it.”

    He tightened his arms as if Igyeol might slip away.

    Through their pressed chests, Dohyeon’s heartbeat thudded rapidly.

    “It doesn’t make me happy at all. Even imagining it
 I get scared something might happen to you.”

    “

”

    “So this time
 you’re the one who needs to give in, Igyeol-ssi.”

    He brushed a thumb gently over Igyeol’s damp lashes, wiping away the lingering tears.

    “No, Igyeol. We can’t.”

    Hearing that face-to-face, seeing how pained Dohyeon looked, erased the vague resentment that had been lingering. Igyeol could finally understand the fear behind Dohyeon’s words. He leaned heavily into Dohyeon’s palm and spoke in a slow, soft murmur.

    “
A name. If I become healthy enough someday
 healthy enough to have a baby—if Ihyeon’s little sibling ever becomes possible—then
 please choose the baby’s name.”

    “

”

    “I couldn’t do anything for Ihyeon. Even when he was in my belly, I barely spoke to him. All I ever said was to hold on, just hold on. I didn’t say any pretty or kind words at all. So
 someday
 if I become healthy enough, and if a baby ever comes
 please name them.

    Go to the hospital with me.

    And if I crave something in the middle of the night or early morning, please go buy it.

    Please.”

    “I will. I will do all of that.”

    Pressing his eyes and cheeks lightly against Dohyeon’s chest, Igyeol burrowed into him even more deeply, as if he needed the closeness.

    “
I like you a lot.”

    Moved by the damp, trembling confession, Dohyeon pulled him in tightly and kissed his forehead, his cheek, the corners of his eyes. Cradling the back of his head and waist, he whispered:

    “I love you too.”

    What he offered in return was deeper, heavier, and far more tender than the confession he received.

    Igyeol tucked Dohyeon’s answer deep inside his heart, nestling into the familiar, comforting warmth as he pictured the future that might someday come.

    <‘Divorce Contract’ Side Stories — End>

     

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